So I had an idea to finally grab life by the balls & go do everything I ever wanted. I threw it all away so I could go travel round France for a few months. Incorporate myself with the local lifestyle, work out there picking fruit & shizzle. I wanted to immerse myself & hopefully find some meaning to my life along the way.
Now, now I'm going to party with P Diddy in Cannes & live it up with a bunch of English guys on a beach in Spain. This is not a journey of self discovery. This is a glorified holiday. A long holiday & one I have taken many times before.
I don't want to sweat it out listening to mediocre music with other English people. I don't want to have thrown it all away to be with English people. The whole idea was to get AWAY from the Brits! Now even the stalker ex will be there!
How is this a journey of self discovery! I am not happy. I am not excited & quite frankly I don't feel like going!
This may be a last minute panic attack, but I'm having it anyway!