Love Affair

Having a love affair with Pixie Lott today!  Oooh er, girlfriend is sooo hawt!  It is sooo unfair!  Boo!

I LOVE HER HAIR!  I used to have hair similar & then I had some crazy idea to wreck it & now I look like an animal was brutally murdered to make my barnet!  [tears, lots & lots]

Note to self:  When hair is looking good, do not, I repeat DO NOT go & dye it so dark you look albino in the face & are rendered un-photogenic!  Urgh!

I finally ventured out for drinks last night with la famille, not only was I looking like a freakin' albino in the face (everyone was tangolicious) but the camera was vomiting all over my face in EVERY God damn pic!  UUURRRGGGHHH Major technology rejection!

Anyway, back to the matter at hand...

Eleanor alerted me to the Pixie post on the Dail Mail's website (yes, yes we are DM readers, not gonna lie, they have good celeb gossip), not to make me aware of Pixie's hawtness though, but in fact to make me aware that the ex Francois (the super stalker one, more of that later) was pictured looking like a peen in the crowds!

To aid in my peen point, I provide you with the following evidence...

Can you spot the ex?  Ten points if you can!

Francois, if you are reading this...I shall neither know, nor care, but as Andy Warhol himself said: Don't pay attention to what they write about you.  Just measure it in inches.  (There's a definite pun there.)

I would like to apologise to all whom are easily offended by the site of peens & peen wannabes.

That is all.


  1. Porritt... It is "the ex Francois 'the super stalker one'" Anyhow, despite your fantasies that I stalk you, (last saw you in November, even by my standards that is quite poor attempts at
    I’m only viewing your little blog/diary as I’ve been pointed in this direction by our ‘mutual FB friends’ who say “Stratty your ex-is trying to mug you off again on FB”
    Granted this isn’t the most flattering photo in the world – caught rather off guard and I had been out in the rain solidly for around 6 hours!!!! And pink may not be my colour!!!
    But what are you doing??? Seriously, how old are you? Why feel the need to dig me out or even write about me at all…? I think you really need to take a look in the mirror and grow up! From what I’m aware a blog shouldn’t be a diary and its pretty pathetic to disclose personal shizzle over zee web!
    Also if you ever want to see a good piece of journalism, maybe you should read some of my previews on Love Music News. Or you can wait for my review of Isle of Wight Festival were I had tickets given to me to review the festival…. Hmmm I think you could learn a lot actually! Also I even sent you the link for the festival reviewing... So it could have been you had you not ignored my email! :)
    P.S Pixie lot is very hot!
    P.P.S That pun is rubbish because my ‘peen’ is definitely at least average size!!!!
    P.P.P.S I've never seen that dildo before in my life

  2. You are quite correct, we have not seen each other since November last year. However, you have texted, called, emailed, sent letters & packages to me EVERY month since. By MY standards, that is stalking & considering you yourself have admitted to stalkerish behaviour, which you have apologised for, I wouldn't bother to make out that I'm making it up.

    You have also admitted on your Twitter that you have been 'indulging' in my blog, so regardless of our 'mutual FB friend', you would have seen it regardless. There are all kinds of blogs, Fashion, Lifestyle, Photography, ect, & mine has always been a personal one. It has been diary style since the beginning. I have nothing to hide.

    I think I'd rather have nothing to do with you. I have no interest in the IOW festival or your review of it. I'm happy with the festivals I'm going to...bar Beni.

    P.S. Yes Pixie is muchos hot.

    P.P.S. I wasn't making any reference to your peen.

  3. You say you have no interest in me, so why take the time to save  picture of me, edit that picture with a massive dildo - not the most of mature things ever!
    Anyhow like you said i have sent you emails apologising etc... which i did geniunlly mean! So you can either accept those apologies and then if you want to banter my "drenched rat/girly mac look" its fine as long as its to me! Or not accept it and just simply forget about me and stop writing about me on various social networks
     Also I really hope its not because of me that you are not looking forward to Beni... Line-ups not the greatest but it will still be quality!
    Finally sorry for the dig at the blog.... havn't read much of it, but some (bar the digs at me) look goood!
    Have a lovely time on your travels... Romeo Done! X

  4. Apologies, it was an art project I couldn't resist!

    I accept your apologies & shall decease from my evil (but very funny) ways.

  5. This is amazing!!! Team Alix!!! P.S. This Francois is an embarassing dick!! I'm sorry but I've never read his reviews in the Observer or NME or even Q?! It seems to me (from an outsiders point of view) that this Penis look-a-like mac boy is basically 'following' you to Beni (how embarassing) to re-kindle what seemed like the one sided romance.

    P.S why don't you actually grow said penis and realise its not because Alix is obsessed with you, but rather because she hates you and wanted to mug you off to everyone.

    P.P.S Good job Alix.

    P.P.P.S all these p.p.p.'s make no sense

  6. Its not a mac, its a cagoule... And Indianna Jones wears one!

  7. Its not a mac, its a cagoulle! Indiana Jones wears one!

  8. I don't care what it is, he still looks distinctly peen like! Ha!