30.3.14

Insightful Sunday - Completion

http://www.pinterest.com/ouijetaimeaussi/

I was having a late night chat with my favourite person, Miss Charlotte, last night, about our dreams & I came to the realisation that a very LARGE & important part of mine, is having a partner.  Which, startled me in a way.  I'd always been such a feminist growing up, fully under the belief, that "you don't need a partner to complete you," but now, well, I kinda feel the opposite.

I want to share my life with someone, to share the highs & take comfort in their arms during the lows.  I've grown & developed over the past year, during my travels & I'm confident in myself & what I'm capable of, but sometimes, it's hard to do it all alone.  

I do think it's important to enter into a relationship on equal footing, knowing you are quite capable of being on your own, but appreciating being with someone else.  There is nothing more damaging in a relationship, than being reliant on someone else to make you happy.  It only serves to build up resentment & dependency, which wrecks a relationship like a bad case of woodworm.

Equally so, it's important to have a strong & healthy relationship with yourself, before you can have one with anyone else.  How could you ever accept someone's love, if you aren't capable of loving yourself, as you are, flaws & all.

Your partner should be your bestfriend, you should inspire each other, encourage each other, care for each other, be there for each other & LOVE each other, completely & unconditionally.  There is no compromise.  With billions of people in this world, there is someone, who fits with you like a jigsaw piece, who balances you out, who makes you want to be alive, to live, to breath, to feel, just because they're there & they make the world better.

I've had countless relationships start, then crash & burn before even becoming legitimate.  I've given my heart away, like a goody bag at the end of a kid's birthday party & had it shredded into confetti, on numerous occasions.  I'm done with dead ends & poor choices, I'm ready, ready for the end goal.  To find someone, who completes me, who fulfills me, who makes my life whole.

If they happen to be brown-eyed, bearded, have a penchant for skinny jeans & happen to be open to living in Paris, then all the better.

4 comments:

  1. I hope that the bearded guy will show up in your life in the near future. You're right about loving and accepting yourself first, it's so important. I really admire you for the route you take in life, travelling because it was a dream of yours and being so honest about your experiences. Love to read your stories!

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    1. Thank you Daphne, that means a lot to me. I get a little teary eyed sometimes, reading some of the comments I get, they help keep me inspired to carry on, when sometimes I could quite easily run back to England & jump into the nearest bed, with my dog cuddled up besides me. I too hope that my Bearded companion turns up soon!

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  2. I don't believe being a feminist and having a partner in your life are in any way incompatible. You said it all in your post, really. It's about being independent so you can enter the relationship in equal conditions, but wanting a partner is the most normal thing. Who wouldn't want a best friend who you trust and with whom you can share everything? That just sounds amazing and I also want that in my future, even if I am a very independent person overall. (I just don't want it right now because there are things I want to do, learn and experience on my own at this particular moment).

    Btw, hi! New reader here. I read some of your entries the other day and really liked your blog :) It's amazing that you're doing what you're doing with your travels. Best wishes!

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    1. Hi Raquel!
      I agree, plus, etching closer & closer towards my thirties, I realise that, whether you know these things or not, you still have to experience life & date all of those unsuitables, in order to grow as a person & develop into someone who's ready to be a permanent part of someone else's life. Knowing what you want & being ready for it, are two very separate things & sometimes, people don't understand this & that can often result in heartache. So I think you are quite right, to acknowledge that you're not ready for the 'last guy' & to go off to do your own amazing thing!

      Thank you for reading, I hope you will continue to enjoy more of my travels with me. :)

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